Waterproof Hanger : good to know!

Just when you think the world of random crap cannot throw anything new at you... Amazon throws up this marvel of a creation, the "waterproof hanger". So now you can do away with all of those rusty plastic ones hanging in your wardrobe and drop £12.00 a pop on a set of these babies :)

Three Cheers for Facebook!

Well, I guess it had to happen sooner or later with all the meddling and fiddling they do seemingly just to "stay busy", or as I like to think, just to annoy me but, Facebook has seemingly crashed.

I had trouble accessing it first thing yesterday morning and now today I have been completely unable to access the site.

I have read somewhere that it is because someone spilled coffee on the servers, though this is doubtful unless it was done on intentionally, and knowingly where it would cause the most disruption possible. As I said, I doubt it.

For a long time now I have said that people who "claim" to be "addicted to facebook" are sad sad losers and need help, but not for their "addiction". But, having spent a whole day off work (I have a new job by the way ....finally!!) when I am used to sitting at a computer with access to facebook, even if it is just to chat to a couple of friends to pass some time, I am actually at a loss as to what the hell I am doing.

It isn't all bad though, without this disruption to my usual internet habits, I would probably not be posting on my blog as I am now, and that was one of my new years resolutions too, blog regularly!

Thanks for helping me be semi-productive facebook, see you when you're back online!

Where Have the Singers Gone?!

OK, so tonight I happened to watch "The Bodyguard" with my girlfriend and her family. Great

movie, blah bla blah. However, at one point, girlfriend's sister pointed out how effortlessly powerful Whitney Houston's voice was. So maybe in the shot she is miming, but I have seen footage of her not miming, and it is not all that different. The point I am making is, Whitney can SING!

Not just Whitney either, go back through all the great female singers, Whitney Houston, Mariah Carey, Aretha Franklin, Nina Simone, Ella Fitzgerald, Gladys Knight, Billie Holiday, Diana Ross, Dusty Springfield.... The list truly is endless, and this is just females, there are tonnes more male singers from times gone by who are rightly considered "the greats".

What do we have today? Pixie Lott, who sounds like she's having her bikini line waxed while singing... Justin Bieber? do not get me started!

Truth is, even those who stand out today among the crowd of awfulness, people like Alicia Keys, Michael Buble, NeYo... would they have made it among the greats like Sinatra? Could they have cut it with talent like Ray Charles? The odd one maybe, but most of them, probably not.

What has happened to make people so much worse at singing than we used to be? Is it that it is easier to make a living in a non-risky career than it used to be?

Or... are we, as a society, encouraging mediocraty on a scale never before seeen? If this is true, what on earth does the future hold for (loosely used as most of what I hear on the radio has a cheek to call itself...) "music"?

Ebuddy is not MY buddy!!

A few months back, I was lucky enough to find a contract cheap enough to allow me to have an up to date phone after having several years of second hand functional, yet unexciting phones. After some advice from a couple of techy friends, I opted for the HTC Hero, which I have not been disappointed by. It is a great phone.

I was advised that "ebuddy" was the best instant messaging app to use for Android

phones, so I quickly indulged in a free download from Android Market. At first, I was happy with the app, it worked well and was easy to use. Something important when you have your first smartphone in my opinion.

However, since I rarely use IM on my phone, I expected ebuddy to take a back seat to the "Emesene" messenger I use on my Ubuntu laptop, though since having ebuddy on my phone, every time I sign into emesene, I am confronted by their branded personal message....

"on my mobile with eBuddy www.ebuddy.com/android".

While using ebuddy on my phone, I am not bothered what adverts they decide to put in my status, but when I am using my laptop daily and am forced to have to change it every single time i sign on, I am not so happy. In fact, that is an understatement, it has been going on so long now with apparently no way of removing the ebuddy virus, I am now pretty angry with ebuddy. What's more is, I know I am not the only one this happens to, from trawling through google searches and android forums, many people seem to be having this issue yet the best advice offered anywhere is "the app works well on your phone, so this is a small price to pay". Obviously missing the point, and since I don't even have the app on my phone anymore, it's even less a price worth paying.

No other app tries to infest other parts of my life, so why does ebuddy insist upon doing so?! I have emailed them and requested to know why I cannot get rid of this, but thus far, I have received no reply. There isn't even an option via the app, or their web page for the deletion of your "ebuddy id", which further annoyed me as it is the only thing I can see left which may prevent ebuddy from taking over my IM any longer!

World Cup 2010 South Africa

Ok well, with the World Cup all done and dusted I thought I would take a look back over some of the tournament ups and downs.

Firstly, I have been unimpressed by the tv coverage trying to make out that the tournament will somehow "help the African continent". All it has served to do is further oppress the poor and show how wasteful and vain the once idealistic nation has become already! Spending millions and m

illions and millions on new stadia which will never be used, at least for football, again is frankly dumb at best.

I will start low and finish on a good note :)

World Cup Lows

Being part Italian, I can't help but complain about our dire performance at these finals. Mainly, in my opinion, due to Lippi's late inclusion of the talented youngsters rather than letting them gel throughout qualifying. Aside from this, we were shat on from a great height by some poor linesmen, first in the New Zealand game when they were given a goal by a guy 2 yards offside inside the 6-yard box! Aw

ful decision, though on balance, the kiwis DID deserve their draw for their heroic second half defensive performance. We were also robbed against Slovakia by an English linesman (at which point i was forced to support the Germans to be a manifestation of karma vs England) who disallowed an equaliser scored by Quagliarella after which Slovakia scored again, as did we. In short, we was robbed!

From the off, the punditry at this tournament has been at best sickeningly poor. Adrian Chiles and Alan Shearer being the worst offenders, with everyone else not at all far behind. The lack of knowl

edge shown all round not only in terms of basic analysis, but the fact that not one of these so-called "experts" had bothered to do any research about the teams involved, especially earlier on in the tournament when the smaller nations were playing has been frankly astonishing. All too often we'd get a half time and post-match analysis which included no actual knowledge of who was playing and very often, not one players name was spoken, perhaps out of fear of saying it wrong, though this doesn't usually bother the English, as denoted by the commentary of these finals, equally poorly and with some shall we say "creative" pronunciations of players names. Usually commonly known, short named players. Very professional!

Shearer pictured here revelling in an octopus' infinitely more competent football knowledge.

My next gripe has been ITV's online coverage, the itv.live website which they have put up is atrocious! It is as resource hungry as the United Nations, and was the most laggy, poor stream I have ever encountered. For ITV games, I was forced to use the Scottish channel STV's stream as it was 100% better. As was all of BBC's online coverage.

As for the football itself, my only real gripes were the Portugal v Brazil game, which was slow, uninspiring and about as full of flair as a photocopy engineer called Colin from Swindon. I never want to see a game as poor as that again, and I guarantee I wont. Lightning does not strike twice as they say, and I hope!

The harshest thing for me was Slovenia not going through to the second round, only being denied by the USA scoring in the last minute of play in their game with Algeria. In my opinion, Slovenia were the best and most consistent performers in Group C.

I have been forced to eat several hats regarding the behaviour of the English fans. As far as I am aware, there was absolutely no trouble from them whatsoever. So fair play to them. However, I was much dismayed at their disgraceful display of disloyalty in booing the England players off the pitch after their game with Algeria. Ok England didn't play all that well, but you are at the World Cup, feel happy and proud you ungrateful sods! At least poor Rooney had the fortitude to speak his mind after giving his all for the team as always.

Did i mention the quality of the refereeing? No? Ok, don't get me started!

And onto the high points

My favourite moment during the whole finals has to be Marcel Desailly's celebration after Ghana scored against Serbia in their opening game talking about a tiny tv with 100 people gathered round and a chicken and a goat running about the place. Absolutely hilarious!

I was pleased that Ghana got so far too, they have been pretty consistent in major tournaments in recent years and seem to be becoming a regular knockout stage fixture. Uruguay also have impressed, they have played solid football and were pretty close to a place in the final, one of the true dark horses of the tournament.

Another fair play goes to South Africa for beating France to retain some national pride and dump out the nation who had cheated their way to the finals and played with all the passion of magnolia paint. France were not the only "big" nation to suffer some first round mayhem either, with Italy also crashing out and Spain and Germany both suffering losses at the group phase. A bit of pressure on the big teams always produces some good football and is infinitely more interesting than predictable results.

Aside from Desailly's comedy celebrations, Diego Maradona has provided many laughs with his seriously

bizarre antics on the sideline and his suit which makes him look like a 12 year old boy appearing in court in

his fat dad's suit. Good old Maradona, always good for a laugh. Manu Adebayor also provided some seriously quality entertainment talking in whatever language he was speaking. Could have done with subtitles many times watching him!

Goal of the tournament is hard, I cant decide between Siphiwe Tshabalala for the opening goal of the tournament vs Mexico. Fabio Quagliarella's superb lob against Slovakia. Luis Suarez's curled effort against the Koreans. Tevez's rocket to nail Mexico. And last but not least, Giovanni Van Bronckhorst's 18th minute screamer against Uruguay in the semi-final.

Game of the tournament has to be Portugal's footballing masterclass in beating North Korea 7-0 and still battling to get more right until the very final whistle.

Player of the tournament is probably David Villa, as he is the only reason Spain got to the final (aside from Puyol's 1 goal) among a tournament dominated more by close-knit teams overcoming odds though a special mention should go to Diego Forlan for his efforts, but for me, the player of the tournament was Bastian Schweinsteiger who had a completely flawless tournament for Germany.

Biggest let-down has to be Lionel Messi, a man who I have repeatedly called over rated. Seems I have been proven right, as when it mattered, he shrank and disappeared.

Most Epic Tackle Award goes to Nigel De Jong of Holland for his drop-kick into the chest of Alonso in the final. He can be proud of that challenge for the rest of his life. Special mention to Mark Van Bommel for his 8 thousand fouls for which he's only been booked twice somehow.

Biggest failure in football has to be Sepp Blatter for not allowing goal-line technology and then getting proved as wrong as Neville Chamberlain. I however also, don't want "goal-line technology", I am much more in favour of a video referee to perform the same duties as one would in rugby. It is efficient and accurate.

I am sitting, watching the final as I type and once again the right team will not win. Germany "should", and were good enough, to win this and the previous 2 World Cups as they once again have been by far the best team, showing in the maturity and quality in hammering one of the favourites, Argentina, into their coffins with their third 4-goal game.

As for the final itself, it was nervy, and tense, but Howard Webb and his cronies have completely ruined the game with that call for the corner. And guess what, same ref and same linesman who knocked Italy out. World Cup 2010 ends in disgrace and as for the punditry now post-match, licking Spain's arse, what team have they been watching? Spain have been far far from being the best team in this tournament and in this game. Tut tut tut.

Man of the match, Elijero Elia.

PS. can someone stick Webb's medal right up his arse please?!

oh and by the way, the octopus got it right.... wanker

The Ash Cloud of 2010!

Well, with the whole world still at the beck and call of the Icelandic volcanic ash cloud after almost a week, I thought it time to muse some.

First of all, if one more news reader or "expert" says that the government are being over cautious one more time, I am going to call in a bomb threat during the news at 10 (this is not a bomb threat!). For once, the lives of innocent people are being put before profit and greed. Hat off to whoever made the call for that. If there is a chance the dust can turn to huge globs of glass inside the engines of planes and cause them to crash, then who the fuck is a poxy newsreader to suggest otherwise?! Twankers!

Second of all, there has been some over reaction during the kerfuffle, regarding those making their way back to the uk "under their own steam". Well, who else's steam did they think they were going to get back on? If you're in a foreign country and are unable to fly home, you are not under any circumstances a hostage and nor are you in any way shape or form in a negative situation. After all, you went abroad to escape the stresses of old blighty right?! OK I understand people have jobs etc to get back to and pets, and all the food will have gone off, but so what? You're british, make the best of it and go sit your fat arse back on the beach in your 5 year old's england kit.




















Another thing which amused me about this getting back to britain palarva was when the navy decided to let a few hundred civvies on a warship to fetch them back with some squaddies from afghanistan. In particular the old fella they had on the news explaining the "dunkirk spirit" amongst the passengers. What? Your holiday got unexpectedly extended and you feel like you're invading france old boy? Well done! It was dubbed a naval rescue mission, and the evacuation of santander among other ridiculous things, none of which it actually was. So a battleship picked up a couple of hundred civilians while fetching some soldiers. There was an evacuation plan in place, then there wasn't it was just a one off, then whitehall announced on lunchtime news the navy would "swing into action" to "rescue stranded holiday makers", though quickly retracted their statement probably after someone showed them the cost of it all.

The next victims/whinging pussies of the ash cloud were liverpool fc. Do you know, they are being forced to play an away fixture during a volcanic eruption in a different continent! Poor liverpool. The main news was that Rafa had a turn and moaned to a news conference among whom not one reporter felt any sympathy for him and then the news began to track liverpool across europe! BBC's headline was "Liverpool reach Paris on Madrid journey" or something equaly over dramatic. Basically, because there are no planes, liverpool had to get a bus instead. The journey is about 600 miles, which should take 10-12 hours to drive. Not for liverpool's team coach! For them it takes 3 days and several dramatic journey updates. I could drive it in one stint, as I am sure the travelling supporters will do! In short, Rafa shut up, you whinging old plonker!

Highlights of the cloud were the weather segments showing sunset pictures because suddenly even chavs found out that actually sunsets are pretty beautiful. And also the joke "volcanic ash: preventing terrorism since april 2010" because if you don't laugh, you'll cry.

Why does snow cripple the UK?!?!

Right, why oh why, does a bit of snow bring Britain to its knees? Many other countries manage to function perfectly well when they are under snow and ice for 6-12 months of the year. For example, Alaska, Sweden, Norway, Finland.....and any other country right up there in or near the Arctic Circle. Here, public transport stops (including trains), food supply lorries stop, fuel lorries stop, post stops, everything stops, and everyone suffers in some way.

Many places there have advanced systems in order to keep their cars from freezing over night such as a facility to plug in their car to an electric socket which runs a heater element to keep the coolant warm. They have more advanced snow ploughing routines, ok that's because they are used to it and get a lot more snow than we do for longer than we do. Obviously measures like this would cost a lot to implement, especially during a recession. However, there are a variety of basic measures available which can be implemented here in Britain at the drop of a hat, and wouldn't cost the Government a single penny.

The first measure I would like to have implemented is for them to allow snow tyres to be legal on British roads, as I believe they are currently banned due to the damage they can do to non icy tarmac. Never mind the fact that thousands of people every year are victims of car accidents because no commercially available tyre in Britain is suitable for driving on ice or snow. Snow tyres are a bare minimum requirement in countries like Sweden when the snow sets in each year. Why cant we use them here, if everyone had a spare set of wheels in their garage with snow tyres fitted, a hell of a lot of damage to people's property would be avoided. and perhaps they could tax the snow tyres to account for the extra damage to the tarmac (though where I live in west Wales, the council resurface the roads every summer anyway).



The second and final measure which would prevent accidents and prevent public transport from having to be withdrawn is ADVICE!! If on the news, there was to be an "expert" issuing advice on driving on ice and snow, instead of just saying not to go out "unless you have to". Of course, we have to, people work, therefore they need to travel. But, as it is not part of the driving test, (and yes, they can create icy surfaces to test us on) people do not know how to drive properly on snow. The amount of people I see stuck on hills revving their cars in 1st gear trying to make progress and failing is ridiculous. I was lucky enough to have several driving lessons at a time of year where there was ice and snow on the roads, and my instructor was good enough to talk me through it and drum it into me the correct technique for driving in these conditions. Yes, I agree, the roads are still going to be treacherous, and yes, I agree, there will still be accidents, but, this simple step could prevent more than a few.

All the news would have to put up is a few bullet points during the weather broadcast advising people that when driving on ice or snow to drive at slow speeds obviously, and to keep their car in a high gear and maintain as low revs as possible (when I drive in snow all I hear is my instructor repeating the phrase "HIGH GEAR, LOW REVS!"). Also, not to use their footbrake. Instead, use engine braking by dropping down to 2nd or 1st gear to slow the wheels rather than locking them with the brakes. And lastly, not to make any sudden movements, whether it be the steering, slowing down, or speeding up. if everything is done in plenty of time, then you shouldn't encounter too much problems on the road.

Perhaps a more long term measure would be for the UK driving test to include some basic training at driving on slippery surfaces, even if they have to build an ice rink in major towns to accommodate this. You can't continue to give young people a poor quality level of tuition and then expect them not to go on to make mistakes in their driving careers. This isn't for driving instructors to implement, the Government needs to roll out a new minimum level of skill in order for people to be allowed to drive a motor vehicle on the road. This is relevant for everyone from the every day commuter, to housewives going to the shops, to lorry drivers and as they're responsible for the lives of potentially hundreds of lives at once, drivers operating public transport.